Our four-year-old has taken to singing …and in every way you’d expect a four-year-old to sing, it’s awesome. He sings “The First Noel” as he builds Legos and he sings “Jingle Bells” on the way to the grocery store. He serenades us with “Father Abraham” at the dinner table and he delights in talking about the night he sang to us – the night at his school’s Christmas program when he didn’t actually sing any of the words, but was instead overcome by a bit of stage fright:
Regardless, he was still the cutest little bird you ever did see, and he’s continued to delight the world with his vocal renditions ever since – even if his twisted interpretations drastically change the songs altogether.
Grandma got married from a reindeer: it’s true, it’s true. Anyone can pay twenty-five bucks and get a license to officiate marriage from the Internet, even Santa’s big, hairy, flying helpers.
Mary had a baby …just for me! In the height of individualized evangelical Christian culture, “born for us” is replaced with “just for me.” Ce la vie. We tried.
Father Abraham had many sons, so let’s go feed the Lord! Hey, God gets hungry, too! It’s not just the Israelites who needed some manna from the skies but the big G-O-D himself.
We won’t die until we get some: with nods to “figgy pudding,” this rendition is dedicated to all the cupbearers and food tasters of the Renaissance period. Thanks for keeping the king alive!
Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Why sing the end Hey! of Jingle Bells when you can sing Hey! for every syllable in the sentence? It’s not annoying at all.
Jesus loves the fairy children: You know, it’s about time we stopped discriminating against the fairy children – they deserve Jesus’ love, too!
In fields where they lay, keeping zero sheeps – I mean, I don’t know about you but this changes everything. What? No sheep? So what were the shepherds keeping then? Wild boar? Flamingos? Hippopotami? Truth, be revealed.
That’s it for now, but I’m sure there will be more to come. So, have a laugh, share a laugh and enjoy this season with those you love.
So, what are some of your favorite twisted song interpretations, especially if they come from the mouth of babes. Let’s start a movement of four-year-old song renditions, shall we?